An open letter to… 

I’m sorry,

I’m sorry that I fail to believe
I’m sorry that I don’t set aside the time
I’m sorry that I try so hard but still feel like I don’t know
But I wish I knew
I wish I knew what I had to do to believe again
I wish I knew what I had to do to feel again
I wish it was just me and you and others who love you didn’t cloud my view of you within this love triangle
I’m trying but I still can’t make out the shape of you
And the thing that makes it so hard to grasp is that I did know you
I knew you so well
I felt you and saw you in everyday
I trusted you and came to you
Now when I try to talk to you it’s like my words are lost
Now when I try to talk to you it’s like we don’t know each other, like we’re strangers
And I keep thinking maybe it’s just me, maybe I’m doing too much maybe I’m not doing enough
I just wish it was how it use to be, like how it’s suppose to be
I don’t want to lose you, I don’t want to leave you but sometimes I don’t know what to do.
And I feel like people see you in me but I wish I could put those lenses on and see the same thing because my vision is blurry and you look so far away.
I feel like I’m drowning in this sea of confusion and the water is about to fall…

Jesus, will you help me walk on water? 


4 thoughts on “An open letter to… 

      1. I really feel that our heart beats as one on life’s questions and concerns
        As you said in another piece being a “lover” can be difficult, painful and sometimes lonely BUT moment of glorious joy in the smallest things rejuvenates the spirit
        Love to you Jazzy girl


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